A New Addition to the Kitchen

Yeah, I rhymed my title. 

Sometimes I'm fuckin creative, deal with it!

I intended to post yesterday, but got distracted by awesome box seats at a Jethawks game.

Yes, you read right. The Fucking Jethawks.

My dad (the majestic beast on the right) and his friend chillin with KaBoom

Oh you don’t know the Jethawks? Educate yourself!  

http://www.milb.com/index.jsp?sid=t491

It was a fun game, with lots of beer and a victory on our part. Before you ask, I do like baseball, I do NOT follow major leagues, and yes I will go to a game with you if you buy me beers.

So anyway, husband and I have been battling for the last two weeks with our crock pot.

Poor guy is past his prime, especially after an unfortunate incident with a slippery sink

Old trusty wasn’t hacking it anymore, and our slow-cooker needs had moved on. First, we sat him down and adequately broke up with him ; it’s not you crockpot, it’s us. We dropped you, after all, and it’s not your fault you’re older than sin and entirely too small for our fat-ass needs.

After many tears, okay mostly my tears and my husband’s laughter at my overly-personified relationship with kitchen appliances, we began the search online.

Fast-forward through all the boring research bullshit and about twenty visits to both crockpot.com and google for reviews, we settled on our new friend – I mean – model, yeah tools aren’t pets…

Isn’t it beautiful!?

Knowing me to be the impatient child I am, husband read my mind, and as soon as it arrived washed and plugged it in, demanding I season a chicken now and submit it to the fiery inferno that is our new friend, ergo the photo of glorious chicken you see before you. Yes, it’s fucking amazing, and no, you can’t have the recipe…today.

My Fuckin Office to Be

I finally got tired of trying to be productive at my dining room table. Okay, not finally, it's been more like an always thing that I was just too lazy to do anything about. The high traffic area combined with the convenience of the kitchen has been doing nothing for my efficiency, or my body. Seriously, it’s hard to look bang-tastic and be useful with Husband’s homemade chili just a few steps away, seducing me with its borderline orgasmic flavors… mmmm…

ANYWAY.

Work. 
Not eating, or discussing how Husband’s cooking makes my no-no happy.

Woo-sah...

I've needed my own space, a zen zone if you will. So I started systematically looking through the house for a potential workspace. By systematically, of course I mean roaming around aimlessly with a water bottle and badgering my husband for kisses anytime I saw him.

I needed somewhere I could spread all the fuck out if needed, and be able to leave things unfinished in a place out of the way where curious hands and dogs paws don’t roam.

And thus, I ambled into the “guest” room, and my genius came into play. 

I am a genius, don’t laugh!

We don’t have guests. We live nowhere, next to nothing, west of Bumfuck. So, by guest room, I mean really a room with a rickety twin bed we just don’t want to let go of and all the gifts/technology we weren’t actively using or planned to "do something with, you know, someday…”

 Photographic evidence of the horror

Doesn’t it look cozy? It sits on the ever so toasty south end of the house, ergo the Jesus-like, all encompassing brightness that is the window. Who wouldn’t want to stay there during the inevitable zombie apocalypse wrought on us by some experiment gone wrong at one of the military technology bases??

Well, I decided. This would be my mountain, my new project to obsess over and forget I’m married in. I’ve done a little cleaning and organizing, and this will be at least a two part post once I bitch slap the space into shape.

For now, all you need to know is, challenge fucking accepted.

Watch With Me

Collection of reviews, discussions, and commentary on music, movies, and television

Mental Health

Collection of all mental health posts

I Made Dis!

Collection of crafts, DIY, tutorials

home improvement
crochet
how-tos

Women's Health

Collection of posts regarding women's health issues

woo-hoo
bra fitting
sex safety?

Penny Pinching

A collection of all of my budgeting and money-saving posts.

Stockpiling Intro

Stretching Groceries

Grocery Prices

The CookBook

A collection of links to all of my recipes, for your convenience.

Banana Bread

Carrot Cake - Box Mix

Cheesecake - No Bake

Chicken Broth

Chicken Tortilla Soup

Chocolate Chip Cookies

Gumbo

Leftover Casserole

Meatloaf

Pecan Pie

Pumpkin Pie

So Here It Is

I often find that all the shit I do around This Fuckin' House is of interest to the people around me. Whether it's cookin' some tasty food, cleaning up some irritating shit, or just making my house tolerably aesthetic, people want to know how the hell I do it.

SO FINE! 
I'VE CAVED! 
Damned peer pressure.

Instead of clogging up my precious Facebook with these things, I've decided to start a blog. Most of you don't seem to mind that I don't sugar coat with professional Nancy language, or flowery descriptions on how I manage to do the amazing shit I do. If you're looking for a friendly, polite blog, this is not it.
You're fucking welcome!

Please, don't hesitate to let me know if there's something I can post about to make your life easier. I will most likely find a way to give a crap long enough to post it here for your lovely eyes to peruse at your leisure.

And without further ado, welcome to This Fuckin' House; a blog about all the things I do around here to keep life going. This blog is loaded with impatience, curse words, and is most certainly not suitable for your damn kids.