Adventures in Target

Husband more or less demanded that I put real people clothes on today and go to the store to grab some necessities. We were out of creamer, which is damn near unforgivable in This Fuckin House.

On the plus side, I like visiting Target, so really it wasn't all bad. I got to peruse some fantasy items, as well as get my coupon on. As is becoming the norm, I also made some "friends" along the way. This has become almost habit, since being unemployed has made me a little starved for interpersonal situations.

My first sort of friendship formed in the dog aisle, when I found some epic sales on Pedigree 50 pound bags, and realized they were beyond my ability to lift. Luckily, a fellow dog owner was nearby to help load my haul, and we commiserated about larger dogs and their bottomless stomachs. I gave him some of my coupons, we laughed about struggles of training, and went on our way. I bumped into him repeatedly after that, each time with him offering to trade my polite sheps for his unruly trio of pit bulls. I politely declined.

Apparently, a handful of regulars and employees have given me a nickname, based on a prior visit. I was out with my sister, who had driven me to the store since I had taken some Vicodin and had no desire for a DUI. With the joy of shopping and narcotics, I was in a good mood, so when my sister pointed out some seasonal baking items on clearance, I was ecstatic. "Oh my fucking God, jimmies! Jimmies are on sale," I had exclaimed. Not only did my sister almost fall on the floor laughing, but I was overheard and thus dubbed, "Jimmies." I like to think it's because I always impressed my fellow Targeters, and until then had not been attributed a name, but really this is the AV, and we like to ogle freaks.
So anyshoe, I discovered today that I had been nicknamed when I crossed paths with an employee in the bakery aisle. "Jimmies!," he exclaimed, and I burst into laughter. I confirmed that I was the jimmies lover, and went so far as to ask for the inside scoop on the next clearance. Thusly, a friendship formed.

Still, again, I made friendship in the checkout lane with some fellow coupon queens, who not only exchanged tips and techniques with me, but straight up gave me their Mickey Mouse reusable bag to add to my collection!
It was a colorful day, filled with delicious happiness.